Dealing with Emotional Vampires

Dr David Hamilton

I listened to a webinar at the weekend with the Barefoot Doctor, Stephen Russell interviewing Dr David Hamilton.  If you have never come across David, he is a truly interesting and lovely person.  He is a scientist who started his career in the pharmaceutical industry, researching the placebo effect in the development of new drugs for heart disease and cancer.  He is now a bestselling author and he travels the world offering workshops to help people understand the power of the mind on the body.  He has a great sense of humour and is able to make complex concepts very accessible. 

During the webinar he talked about a range of subjects including neuroscience, meditation, dealing with negative thinking, spirituality and past life.  He was also asked about how to protect yourself against other people with unhealthy states of mind and ‘emotional vampires’.

David said that everyone is susceptible to catching other people’s emotions, both positive and negative.  This is known as the ‘Chameleon Effect’ and occurs when we start to mirror another person both physically and emotionally.  

So what do you do if you start to get sucked in to a negative state? David’s tip to get out of it is to change your body language by scrambling your facial muscles, put your shoulders back, open your chest and take a deep breath.  When you’ve done that you can start to project your positive energy onto the other person. 

 

If you feel that someone is draining you of energy you can follow the same steps and, as you breathe out, express peace, positivity and inner strength.

Well, it beats wearing garlic around your neck!

Planning for a Happy Retirement

There’s a lot of advice available about pensions and planning financially for retirement.  There’s a lot less about planning for a healthy and happy retirement.  Obviously it’s important to plan so that you have enough money when you retire but it’s important to plan for the other aspects as well.

Alex's Model

Retirement should be a positive experience, something to look forward to as you enter the next phase of your life.  My husband retired last year – something he had looked forward to for years.  He is a keen model maker and reader and by the time he stopped working he had a number of projects lined up that he couldn’t wait to start and a pile of books waiting to be read.  At the end of every day he smiles at me and says “Well that was another great day!”

So, if you are getting closer to retirement, what plans have you made?  Are you thinking about carrying on working but doing something different?  Perhaps you are looking forward to spending more time with your family or travelling or pursuing your hobbies.   This may be your opportunity to do some voluntary work.

 If you’re not sure yet what you want to do, start writing down some options, things you enjoy doing, places you like going to, people you want to see  etc.  You may need to do some preparatory work before you stop working.  If you enjoy being with other people this might be the time to join a club or organisation.  You might want to brush-up some skills by enrolling for an evening class or an on-line course.

Also plan for your physical health and emotional wellbeing by reviewing your eating habits and your exercise routines.

Start planning for a happy retirement and remember “Vision without action is a daydream; action without vision is a nightmare” Japanese Proverb